Friday 18 April 2008

Drifting

Is drifting being lost?!

Most of my life I have drifted, meaning, I never thought far ahead or made many plans. I was never the type of person who would say "When I grow up I want to be ___ (insert any given profession)!!!". Of course I had my own childhood dreams, to be a Ballerina, but, at the age of 10, school became more important. After that I decided to be a Mathematician, however, when I reached the 10th grade I felt like I was not suited to be one. So I decided to study Biology (seeing that I was so good at that). And I did, I am now a Biologist. I even have a Master's degree in Plant Biology. But, once again, I find myself at a crossroad, in which what I did until now does not give me the pleasure it used to give and the sense of fulfilment. To tell you the truth I did not feel accomplished when I finally defended my Master's Thesis; I felt relieved for closing that door.

But now what?!
What is the next step?!

No one can tell me because that is something that only I ca decide. And, above all, I do not wish to be given the answer. (Well, when I feel desperate I do, but only in those moments!!!)

I feel like the stream that has brought me here has somewhat stagnated. SO, am I lost or without a stream to drive me?!

Is drifting being lost or being a little careless?!
I don't see myself as careless, because, once I engage in something, I will give my all to accomplish it.

Oh well, I think it is now time to find myself a new stream and see where it will lead me.

Does it sound like I believe in fate?!
One thing is certain, I don't believe in coincidences, but I do believe in freewill...

As a final note I have to say that I admire the people who, from a young age, know what they want to be and really do work hard to accomplish their dreams (no matter what comes in their way). They have my full respect.